Because I wish I was more likely to meet a guy on a yoga mat, rather than at a bar

Last night while surfing the web I stumbled across an on-line article entitled “ 5 Reasons Why Dudes Should Practice Yoga”. I was intrigued to read on, as earlier in the week I was having a conversation with a male friend about guys who do yoga. His response was of course something along the lines of “yoga is for sissy men” which of course lead to a huge eye roll from me, and a retort of “Real men do yoga”.

Realistically the classes that I teach have more men than women. And actually they are all pretty manly men. Yes, most of them are there with their wives or significant others, but I’m here to tell you, there is nothing sissy about yoga (ask the guys in my Wednesday Night Vinyasa class… their hamstrings may never be the same).

So when I stumbled across this article, written by a man, I was curious as to what his 5 reasons were. I couldn’t help but laugh a little at his last two “It’s a cheap date” and “The women” though the more I got to think about it, he is pretty spot on. I’m not suggesting that all you single men out there should head out to the nearest yoga class to start creeping on women… BUT I am saying, yeah there are a lot of women who go to yoga classes, and a lot of us are single. And realistically I am not the type of girl who likes to go out by myself and sit at bars or restaurants hoping to meet someone. I’d rather pour myself a glass of wine at home and put my feet up than sit awkwardly at a bar and spend money on a cocktail or two… but I have no problem grabbing my mat and heading to a yoga class by myself. And the truth of the matter is that I’m much more likely to strike up a conversation with the person on the next mat, than at the next bar stool. Not only that, but even when my schedule gets busy, I still make time to get to a yoga class… other projects and leisure activities can drop off the deep end, but since I’m teaching I’m guaranteed to be in at least 4 classes a week… you might not run into me out on the town, but your odds of running into my at a yoga class are pretty damn good. I’m not saying this is a call to all single men out there to get to my yoga classes. But I am saying that the article might actually have a point. I mean if people meet at the gym, why not at a yoga class? I don’t think this necessarily is true yet for McMinnville… as I mentioned most of the men I know who are taking yoga are there with their wives or significant others, but since it seems as though more and more of my time is going to be spent at yoga studios, I am kinda hoping this is a trend that changes. Maybe I AM kinda putting out a call for single men to come do yoga… but only if you are there for the right reasons, and not to check out ladies in stretchy pants.  

Maybe this is just wishful thinking on my part… but to some degree isn’t that how people start dating? Aren’t you supposed to go out there and do activities and things that you enjoy and that fulfill you, and maybe along the way meet someone who has a similar passion or interest? Is it really so crazy to think that I might meet my someone at a yoga class?  Maybe in this particular community it is a little much to ask, that I find a handsome single yogi who isn’t too out there, who tolerates baseball (preferably passionate about the Red Sox… but I’d handle toleration) and who puts up with a dog who snores louder than any man I’ve ever known… It’s a stretch… obviously, I haven’t managed to find that person yet. But the second I let go of my hopeless romantic optimism that this particular guy has to be out there somewhere, is the second I start drinking more wine and stop getting out of bed, so I just keep plugging away, eternally hopeful. (totally frustrated, but hopeful.... I realize I might not find him at a yoga class, but a girl can dream).

I also agree with the article that going to a yoga class would be a great date, though my same male friend thinks I’ve totally missed the mark. Sure, yoga isn’t the best place to have a conversation or deeply get to know a person… but then again, neither is going to the movies, or going bowling (I don’t know if people actually go bowling on dates… but they might). Why not go to a yoga class, be a little active, have a common experience, and then go out for a drink afterwards? I tend to be a fan of more active dates where there is something more to do than just have conversation. I’d rather be up doing things, because it is less obvious when you awkwardly fidget or search for conversation. I realize that I am passionate about yoga, and so this seems like a natural activity for me… it also sounds ideal, because it eliminates the “oh what do I wear” debacle, and frankly most of my yoga clothes look better on me than my regular clothes. It is true, that I have often said I am the best version of myself while practicing yoga, and so maybe that is why this appeals to me so much. Why wouldn’t I want a date to see me at my best, to be sharing something with me that I love? I realize not everyone is on the same yoga train that I am, but I really think there are far worse places to take a date than to a yoga class. 

In the meantime, I’m going to be thankful for the male students that I do have in class, because they totally change the dynamic of a practice, and I guess I’ll just have to rely on my baby bulldog to be my yoga date for now. And we can be the best single versions of ourselves, together.

Tasty little quails, and why I'm mostly givng up meat.

Last night I had one of the most wonderful meals… I won’t go as far to say “in my life” but it was pretty spectacular. I ate the entire thing standing up, hurried mouthfuls between busing dishes, and pouring more wine. 10:30 PM found me with my shoes off, picking cold pieces of Parisian gnocchi of a plate with my fingers, sipping dregs of wine from the unfinished open bottles… the entire staff agreed, it was the best event we had ever put on.

The meal was prepared by Andrew Biggs of Hunt and Gather catering… The table was decorated with air plants and terrariums, candles , burlap, and the meal was exactly what we wanted it to be. a Hearty winter meal. (but surprisingly it didn’t leave you feeling heavy and gross… it was rich, but not overly so)

Pan Seared Albacore Tuna with Bana Couda Dipping Sauce

Vegetarian Option: mozzarella cheese and oven dried tomatoes, wrapped in fresh zucchini, drizzled with basil oil.

 (Sadly no pictures of this, but they were beautiful!)

Hubbard Squash Soup with Crispy Pig's Ear Gremolata, Finished with

Olio Nuovo Tuscan Blend

Nicky Farms Boneless Quail Stuffed with Pheasant and Calmynia Fig Sausage, Sautéed Root Vegetables and Parisian Gnocchi, Finished with Arbequina Oil

 Cara Cara Orange Cake with Olio Nuovo Koronieki Ice Cream

And after all that… I think I’m ready to turn over a new leaf.

The food was impeccable… but I’m coming off a weekend filled with documentaries, you know the kind that tell you how unhealthy American’s are, and how we are essentially killing ourselves with what we eat. I know there are two sides to every story, but the thing that stood out to me the most was that 500 calories of plant based food essentially fill up your stomach… so not only do you feel full, but you are also getting tons of essential micronutrients. 500 calories of processed food only fill up about half of your stomach, leaving you still feeling hungry, and not getting the essential nutrients that you need.  And I figure I owe it to my body to do a bit of a detox… and what better month than February? (ok there are plenty of better months than February… like any month when there are actually fresh things readily in season… but I’m going to give it a try)

Just looking at my family history, it seems as though making healthy choices now will really be beneficial. My mother has had cancer, twice. My grandmother has had cancer, twice. My Great aunt is dying of cancer, my other great aunt just discovered pancreatic cancer… The odds are not in my favor. So it only makes sense that starting at a young age, I should make a conscious effort to be active, and follow a lifestyle that will reduce my health risks.  I don’t think that I am currently un-healthy… but I do sometimes fall into a food rut, and I rely far too often on burritos (though I think there are far worse things I could be putting in my body… at least it has vegetables and isn’t deep fried)

I’ve blogged about it before, but my typical life cycle seems to be that I eat really poorly when I am stressed… therefore my body isn’t getting everything it needs to combat the stress, my immune system gets weak, my body gets sluggish, and the overall overwhelmingness of the stress effects my body… It makes so much sense to me that the busiest and most stressful times are actually when we need to be taking care of our bodies the most. This is when we need the healthy home cooked meals… and for me this is when I get them the least. It takes 5 minutes to get a burrito, or grab some take out, but it takes planning and foresight to plan out healthy meals... and it takes time.  And it’s something that I’m working on.

Last weekend I planned out menus for the entire week. I spent most of my day off grocery shopping, cooking for the week, and doing dishes.  I was prepping lunches, prepping snacks… and it was kind of awesome. It was a week filled with meetings, extra yoga classes, after hours networking, late night events… and here I am at the end of the week feeling no worse for ware, and ready to tackle another hectic week. It often meant eating dinner at 9PM, and getting up early to make breakfast… but my energy level is great ! And so next month I’m taking it a step further…adding in a whole foods, essentially plant based diet (god I wish I had a juicer).

I essentially grew up in a vegetarian house-hold. I didn’t eat meat until the age of nine, and even though I love meat now, I rarely ever cook it for myself. There are a few exceptions to this… and there will be at least one exception to it this month, since I have a Coconut Chicken night scheduled with my good friend.  My own personal philosophy on a wholefoods plant based diet is “everything in moderation” I am pledging to cut out meat (minus the coconut chicken) and cut down on dairy, eat fewer eggs, and try to focus more on plants… especially eating more raw vegetables. But I’m not going to give up coffee, I’m not going to give up wine… (will I drink less of it? Probably. ) Perhaps if I were knocking on deaths door, I would be inspired to make a radical change… but really it’s just an experiment for now, and the last thing I want to do is completely inconvenience my life, or the life of others around me. I don’t want to show up for a dinner party, springing my vegetarianism on someone… but like I said, moderation. I plan on spending the month eating less non-plant food, and plan on pumping up the vegetables.

Dear quail stuffed with sausage and figs… you were freaking delicious. Thank you for being a wonderful send off into the land of temporary vegetarianism.

Saturday night, and I'm blogging

It’s 10:21 on a Saturday night… The bulldog is tucked in… and so am I… the makeup is off, the yoga pants are on… Am I 26 or 86? The lines are a little blurry… but I totally acknowledge that it’s a choice… but honestly, can someone tell me what single people do in McMinnville on a Saturday night? (this is not a rhetorical question… someone, anyone … I need some tips) I’ve lived here for eight years and I still am working on that one… I think because the answer is mostly “they leave town.” 

I leave town some… but with a job that often demands long weekend hours, and a 7 month old puppy, my days of late evening trips to Portland, impromptu tequila shots, and spontaneous sleep-overs are pretty much past. And let’s face it, as a group of twenty-somethings with different work schedules, significant others, and differing hobbies and interests, its hard to get us all together for something planned in advance… I know my friends in Portland hang out often, happy hour after work, last minute get togethers… and it’s not like I’m a social recluse living in the sticks. I get out and do things. I have my wine tasting group, and classes, I meet friends for dinner and coffee, my life during the week is fulfilling… but Saturday nights are the worst… these are the nights where all your friends stop answering text messages because they are out interacting with people face to face… they are on dates, and at sporting events, and at bars… and I’m listening to my bulldog snore in the next room.  And I chose it. I chose to stay here, I chose my job, I chose to get a pet… And mostly these were great choices. My job is sometimes stressful, and sometimes frustrating, but it’s also awesome… I just started teaching more yoga… which is also awesome. Toby is the best pet… my life is good… but its Saturday night, and I’m 26… and I’m blogging in my pajamas… and I’m lonely.

There are countless lists of projects I could be doing… books to read, classes to plan, baby-showers to throw… there are hours to waste on Pinterest, tv shows to catch up on, e-mails to write…it’s not that I’m bored, or have a lack of things to do… but projects don’t make up for the fact that I miss having some basic human interaction…  I miss making dinner with someone over a glass of wine, and just talking about life…  

I made dinner with my parents… which was fine and nice, and we talked about life and work… but the problem with parents is that no matter how old I am, my life will always be a puzzle they are trying to problem solve. It doesn’t matter what it is, if I say “oh my new phone isn’t getting my emails” they suddenly try to come at the situation from every angle and offer up how I should handle the situation, what my reaction should be, how I should address things with my boss… every conversation turns into “well maybe you should do this, or try this, or ask this, or address this” and it is very frustrating, and overwhelming.  I know they are just being parents… but mostly it’s just easier to talk with them about things that don’t require any problem solving whatsoever… We try to be social, we really do… but I am constantly being reminded that they are my parents, and no matter how old I am… I always be a work in progress.  This morning I met them at my coffee shop on my way to work… the one I visit at least 3 times a week, the one where I flirt with the baristas, and am friends with the owner, the one where I actually end up working with a number of the staff members on events.  My coffee shop… and as I was leaving with my parents, my mom looks at me and loudly says (in front of several of the people I know) “Tayler, roll those shoulders back, stick your boobs out!”   (true story, this happened this morning)  I’m digressing… but mainly what I’m getting at, is that I am thankful that my family is here and I like spending time with them… but parents are not exactly the socialization that I’m craving (especially since now half the people that I enjoy socializing with over my morning coffee heard my mom talk about my boobs).  I like my family a lot… but a girl needs some separation.

  

Maybe I should put on some lip-stick and head out to the bars without a wing-man? Maybe… but for the moment, I’m content to be tucked in… and maybe in a little bit I won’t feel as lonely…

Goals

I’m on vacation… and two books into the Hunger Games series… I resisted them for so long… and now approximately 4 days and two books in, I’m awake at midnight trying to figure out how I can get my hands on my Brother’s Copy of Mockingjay before he finishes it… (there are no copies in McMinnville right now… at least not at the Library, or bookstores… Can anyone help me out by like 10AM? I’m lying in bed thinking about a futuristic science fiction rebellion… and yes, I’m still single… shocking, no?) as I cannot quiet my mind, and vacation seems to have re-ignited my nocturnal tendencies, I guess a blog post about the new year will do… (I totally predicted the ending of the 2^nd book, by the way… everyone did, right? I’m twenty-six, and these books are written for what age group? Still I feel so much better about reading them than some other teen fad series… I’m really sorry if you are on the Twilight train… I just can’t get there)

2012…  a time for resolutions… well not so much resolutions… I sort of cringe at them… really let’s call them goals (and sadly, I fear if I begin to list them out, many will be the same things I listed last year… I’m pretending to be ignorant of this, and just won’t look at the related blog post)…  

My main goal for the year is to be more positive. To leave my pessimism behind, at least a little bit, and try to embrace the good things in my life. Some days it is so easy to complain… and sadly I think it connects me to people. We all have had rough work situations, frustrating relationships, things we need to vent about… and somehow it seems to much more acceptable to gripe and complain, and to offload about these things than it does to instead focus on and share the positive. Everyone can relate to a bad date, a terrible day at work, a miscommunication… It almost seems like focusing on the positive and celebrating it is like rubbing it in people’s noses… “look at my life, it’s pretty great, I’m so happy!”  I often think back to the Sex and the City episode where Miranda goes on a date with this guy, and he totally makes her feel beautiful and confident, and as a result she realizes how great her life is, and totally celebrates it. Then he never calls her again, and when she decides to confront him about it at the gym he tells her that she seemed really full of herself… I think that is a pretty common fear… you like your life too much, and it’s like you are flaunting it to the world… but you complain too much and the result it just as off-putting… My solution… just to be happy where I’m at… and maybe that means sharing my life a little less… not venting as many frustrations, and maybe just focusing on some positives. Because life is pretty great. I have a supportive family, a job, an apartment, and a best buddy pet… and at the end of the day after all my frustrations, and struggles, and failed attempts… that is all that really matters… so I’m staying positive in 2012… and maybe, just maybe putting off more positive energy will draw more positive energy back my way.

Oh and I’m also trying to take better care of myself… which of course encompasses, mental, physical, financial and emotional aspects of my life… I don’t know what all that entails yet… but I’m taking mutli-vitamins, and committed to 5 yoga classes a week,  I’m going on vacation soon, and obviously I'm reading more... so that’s a start.